Ways to Support Your Child’s Eating Disorder Recovery During Back-To-School Season
Written by Tiffany Lepa, NCC, LPC-Associate
Periods of transition are tough and can be even more difficult for children and teens struggling with or recovering from an eating disorder. Back-to-school season often comes with stress around having a new schedule, less free time, managing time, extracurriculars, and social relationships. Since eating disorders often develop as a means of coping with anxiety and stress, it makes sense for disordered behaviors or thoughts to crop up in periods of transition. Our team of therapists in Austin, Texas is here to support you, your child, and your family.
What factors contribute to eating disorders in children and teens?
The prevalence of eating disorders and other mental health concerns in children and teens has more than doubled since the start of the pandemic. Eating disorders extend beyond food and bodies in that they can provide a means of relief from anxiety and stress, coping with trauma, a way to attempt to “fit in” or present to the world in a certain way, and a sense of control amidst chaos. So what contributes to developing an eating disorder?
Genetic Predisposition + Family History
A history of disordered eating and dieting within the family (parents, siblings, etc.) can increase the likelihood of children and teens developing an eating disorder.
Extracurricular Activities
Eating disorders are prevalent among children and teens who participate in extracurricular activities, specifically sports and other body-focused and performance activities such as dance. Many sports and performance-related activities have stereotypes around what a participant “should look like” (for example, slender versus muscular). Remarks from coaches or instructors about a child or teen’s body can often fuel disordered eating or compulsive exercise behaviors. Your child may begin to associate self-worth and achievement with their physical appearance and how it impacts performance.
Peer Group + Social Media
Developmentally, your child is in a place where they’re trying to fit in with others while also developing their own identity. Social comparison is strong among adolescents, and social comparison can be both helpful and harmful. Humans are social beings, so we naturally look to others for inspiration and guidance. However, children and teens are more prone to feeling self-conscious as they are still figuring themselves out. By comparing themselves to others (family, friends, people they see on social media) or hearing their family and peers make comparisons, it can lead to low self-esteem.
Anxiety + Perfectionism
Individuals who have perfectionistic and anxious tendencies are at a higher risk of developing eating disorders as a means of coping. High achievers often experience more stress, higher rates of depression, and lower self-esteem. It’s important to understand the root of high-achieving, perfectionist, and anxious tendencies and the purpose it serves for them.
Stress + Time Management
Your child’s schedule may be packed, and oftentimes, it can leave little space for mealtime, rest, eating intuitively, or finding space to do things they enjoy. Much like their own caregivers, kids are under a lot of stress and taught to put their needs aside and prioritize productivity. This can lead to a disconnection between mind and body.
Gender Dysphoria + LGBTQIA+ Youth
Eating disorders have a significantly high occurrence among trans, gender nonconforming, and queer-identifying youth. Factors that play a role among this population include bullying, gender dysphoria (distress related to their body not aligning with their gender identity), discrimination, fear of rejection, trauma, and other stress-related issues. It is extremely important to work with providers who are affirming of your child’s identity.
Body Changes + Body Image Concerns
Childhood and adolescence are filled with body changes that often seem to appear overnight. These changes may cause children and teens to feel like they lack control around their body, thus leading to disordered behaviors as an attempt to control how they appear or are perceived by others. Everyone’s development looks different, however. Youth may compare their own growth to their peers and begin to feel like there’s something wrong with them if they look different. (Learn more about the impact of teen body image concerns on mental health and self-esteem by reading this blog post!)
Neurodivergence
When often think of anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa when we think about eating disorders; however, ARFID (avoidant restrictive food intake disorder) is prevalent among neurodivergent children and teens, often related to sensory processing or traumatic food events (for example, choking or vomiting) leading to avoidance of certain foods or eating in general. ARFID can lead to high levels of distress around food and meal time and malnourishment. Additionally, studies show that individuals with ADHD are four times as likely to develop disordered eating than their peers. It’s essential to partner with a dietitian and therapist who understand the intersection of neurodivergence and eating disorders.
How do I support my child’s recovery from an eating disorder?
In order to support your child, you also need to support yourself! Continuing reading for helpful tips.
Be mindful of your self-talk.
It may be a surprise, but children are incredibly perceptive! Be cognizant of how you talk about your own body and yourself in general. Be mindful of how you speak about others. Consider how you talk about food choice and movement. Do you categorize food into “good” or “bad”? How do you speak to yourself? Are you critical of yourself? Do you participate in diet culture? Be gentle with yourself. These ideas are ingrained in us and take time to unlearn! Awareness is the first step.
Consider your own values + expectations.
Consider what you value. What are your expectations for yourself in your work, personal, and family life? What are your expectations for your child? Do you have perfectionist tendencies or overly high expectations for them? Do you allow for flexibility and a growth-oriented mindset where mistakes are seen as learning opportunities versus failure? Reflect on how your own values and expectations may impact your child and collaborate with them on realistic expectations.
Put effort into education.
We get it - having a loved one struggling with an eating disorder can feel incredibly overwhelming and frustrating, and recovery can seem daunting. We highly recommend checking out our Eating Disorder Therapy page and our How To Support a Loved One Struggling with an Eating Disorder blog post for introductory information about eating disorders care.
Foster an environment of open communication.
Seeing your beloved child struggle with an eating disorder is scary and you likely wish you could “fix” them with the snap of your fingers. The reality is that recovery takes time. It’s important to provide an emotional space to discuss mental health, stress, and peer relationships. Know the warning signs of relapse, and be mindful of social withdrawal, body changes, changes in mood, loss of interest in activities, and so forth. It can be helpful to have scheduled check-in times. Use “I” statements and a gentle start-up to express any concerns.
Establish a routine.
Helping your child establish a routine that includes meal time, fun activities, and rest is so important. Schedule intentional time together to foster closeness. Make time for activities that center around other aspects of your child unrelated to food or body-focused activities. Model for your child how to maintain balance in your routine.
Lean on additional support.
A treatment team is essential in recovery. For your child, this may include working with an eating disorder therapist, a dietitian, a medical doctor, and a psychiatrist or psychiatric nurse practitioner. Your child may also benefit from a higher level of care if needed (residential treatment, partial hospitalization, or intensive outpatient treatment). For you, as a caregiver, consider working with an eating disorder-informed individual therapist. Eating disorders impact the whole family systems, so we recommend seeking couples or family therapy, too. Additionally, there are many free support groups for family members of those struggling with an eating disorder. We have included links to local and virtual resources below.
Higher Level of Care
Center for Discovery (Local Treatment in Texas)
Eating Recovery Center (Local Treatment in Texas + Virtual Options)
Within Health (Online Eating Disorder Treatment)
Support groups
Virtual Friends + Family Group (National Alliance for Eating Disorders)
Virtual Family + Caregiver Support Groups (Eating Recovery Center)
Having a strong support network is crucial in eating disorder recovery. Our team of trained clinicians in Texas is ready to offer in-person or virtual support for you and your child through individual, couples, or family therapy. Fill out a contact form to get connected with a member of our admin team, or contact us to set up a free 15-minute consultation call.
