Self-Esteem Counseling in Austin, Texas

What causes low self-esteem?

It is easy to fall into patterns of negative self-talk. Our brains were wired to hold onto negative input to protect us from harm. This is known as the “negativity bias”. This adaptation helped our ancestors avoid dangerous situations, such as remembering which berries were poisonous. But now, it triggers our brains to store negative experiences or thoughts while the positive ones are fleeting. This is why you could receive ten compliments in a day, but one negative remark will be what sticks with you and may cloud how you perceive your day. Our natural inclination to focus on negativity predisposes us to develop low self-esteem. For this reason, it takes consistent work and practice to rewire our brains and change how we talk to ourselves. This is where therapy comes in.

Besides our biological disposition, many environmental factors can contribute to low self-esteem. This can include the messages we learned in our formative years, including the relationships we had and the persistent criticism we received. Our status in society based on our complex identities, discrimination, and trauma can also be tricky.

What are some effects of low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem can hold us back from reaching our goals. When we don’t feel confident in ourselves and assume that we will fail, we are less likely to take the risks needed to grow and be who we want to be. Low self-esteem can also affect interpersonal relationships. You may find yourself drawn to people who don’t make you feel good about yourself. Or, you might find yourself wary of those who treat you well because you don’t think you’re worthy. Lastly, low self-esteem may lead to anxiety, depression, body image concerns, and eating disorders.

Signs and Symptoms of Low Self-Esteem

• Issues setting boundaries or considering your needs

• Comparing yourself to others and never feeling good enough

• Avoiding social situations or feeling self-conscious when socializing

• Difficulty making decisions or trusting yourself

• Struggling to ask others for help or to express your needs

• Negative self-talk and self-criticism

• Fear of failure

• Difficulty accepting compliments

• Sensitivity to criticism from others

• Feeling unworthy of enjoyment or pleasure

• Seeking approval from others

• Perfectionism

• Imposter syndrome

• Feeling like you have to hide parts of yourself in order to be accepted

Therapy for Self-Esteem in Texas Can Help:

Therapy for self-esteem is a non-judgmental space to explore experiences that may have contributed to low self-esteem. Your self-esteem therapist can help you identify unhelpful narratives about yourself. Together, you can work to challenge those thoughts and “talk back” to your inner critic. We can start to replace negative beliefs about ourselves with new ones that allow for self-acceptance. Your self-esteem therapist will also facilitate an exploration of your strengths and values. In order to set realistic goals, we must create discussions that are congruent with our most authentic selves.